Toxicity

For 48 hours after chemo-therapy you are considered toxic. So you take caution and avoid getting body fluids on other people which if you live alone is probably not that difficult. I had thought I would use this time to grow emotionally and spiritually, but instead I have mostly watched TV and read trashy mystery novels and of course Jane Austen. The thing is, I don't know what to do with myself if I'm not working. I could work, I have work to do, but my head really isn't there. There is some fogginess, and some just, not feeling up to doing anything real serious.

It is a rare feeling. After the pressure of writing a dissertation and keeping up with the job, it is odd to just sit back and let things go. And maybe tomorrow I will feel more like returning to doing some work, but I may not. I may learn to make it just a job and not my life. I need something to work towards and some people have suggested that getting well might be the project of a lifetime. I don't know how to do that, since I've never been sick before, but that might be what I have to learn.

So can a compulsive workaholic find happiness not working every moment of the day? I'll let you know, after I start my second job in a few weeks.